Pre-birthday Thoughts

The thing about turning 26 this coming Tuesday is that I am not thinking about it at all.

November 16 has always excited me ever since I got aware that birthdays meant fun, special permission to stray farther than the next block, a gallon of ice cream, spaghetti, a new dress or a new toy. My earliest remembrance of my birthday is my fourth, with Mama and Papa still together. The succeeding years went in a blur, extending from pretty much varied desires: a new toy seen at the department store, a new school bag, a new pair of rubber shoes, cash, a crush to notice me, a university acceptance, Nanay getting well, good health, my family's happiness--and now? Peace. More love and happiness and good health for my family and Kulas. But more so, peace.

Things change no?

I'll be a hypocrite if I'd say I'm not lusting after a number of goods found at the mall. In fact, I want a lot of things. I am even tempted to blow off this month's salary and claim it's my birthday and I deserve a treat. But no. I've done too many stupid financial mishaps this year that I don't deserve even a bag of peanuts.

So when I blow the candles on my birthday cake this Tuesday, I'd make a wish. They come true. I'm a living proof.

***

In other news, I've been thinking of an inexpensive yet fun way to spend the long weekend ahead. Kulas and I firsth thought of Boracay but we have to save for the wedding, plus we have to work tomorrow morning--again extra income will surely help for the big day. So instead of Jonah's banana milkshakes and white sand beaches, we'll be heading up to Antipolo to make reservations for the church and scout for a garden reception.

We're also checking out Intramuros and other Manila churches and receptions. Big rule: no hotels or restaurants for the reception. I want to spend the rest of my wedding night outdoors and not trapped inside a dry air conditioned room with artificial decorations.

Had a meeting with the Center for Environmental Awareness and Education in Gilmore this morning and again I think we're geared for a big thing at work. Tina's coming up with her first photo exhibit at Cosnpiracy on December 18. It's high time she does this. You can amaze yourselves by checking out her works at buzznet, just type in her user name: foolmoon.

Meanwhile, I've been suffering both from physical and mental constipation. The former has been dealt with, resulting in my constant trips to the loo, an even higher fiber diet and less meat. It's stress and idleness at the same time, I think. The latter is harder. I'm always tired. My mind refuses to cooperate most of the time and I'm almost always on auto pilot. I can't even write a decent blog entry. The solution to this, I think, is decluttering. Mental decluttering.

Ang tagal ni Kulas. I'm done with my caesar salad and my Gardenia chocolate bread. I'm bored to my skull here at the office. It's Friday, payday and I'm supposed to be celebrating. I'm ranting. I'm outta here.