random thoughts, musings and workings of a totally warped mind. tintin is a colorblind writer who paints,dreams of flying a kite along EDSA, teaches middle & high school writing & literature, and is the future mother of Kulay and Una Rosa Maria.

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

With 8 days before the wedding, I have given up on thinking about the what-if’s on the day itself. I figured I have already tried to please most people as far as the wedding is concerned just because I want everyone to be as happy as I will be on that day. Of course, it’s about me and Kulas and if glitches still arise, I shall no longer care and just enjoy the day. An uncle here, an aunt there; some friends on the other side: all of them had expressed their own conditions regarding the wedding such as I’m-going-to-walk-out-if he-shows-up, etc. etc.—statements that gravitate to themselves alone. People seem to have forgotten that it is my wedding, for crying out loud.

But I don’t care anymore.

I’m going to have a blast smiling at people as I walk down the aisle, while Kulas lovingly waits for me by the altar. And then I’m going to be laughing the rest of the night away, dancing with him, thanking the heavens for giving me this man.

***
We’re almost done. Thanks to our last minute decision to hire an on-the-day coordinator. Still, sleep is hard to come by. I’ve been taking melatonin pills but I don’t know if it’s actually working or I’m just exhausted most of the time thus the deep shut-eyes.

Holy crap, I can’t believe we’re down to eight freaking days! Eight days! Eight days! :)

***
Tere’s arriving on the 11th. I’ve asked Mama and TJ to pick her up at the airport while I soak in the tub in my Diamond room :) Mama, TJ, Kieyh, Tere and I will then have dinner on the eve of my wedding. Just the five of us.

I don’t want to think about what will happen as I wake up on the morning of May 12. I’m excited as hell and I can’t wait, can’t wait for Boracay!
***
Tomorrow's dinner in Makati with the girls. No man-in-uniform stripper. Tsk, tsk. Ha ha. As if :)

***
There is still a number of wedding stuff that Kulas and I need to attend to but now I try to sit down with a good book while munching on my favorite oatmeal cookies and pretzels. The book for the moment is “Bee Season” by Myla Goldberg. I tell myself I want to write like her and tell stories like she does.

***
I have been the Unbeliever not so long ago. I questioned the institution of marriage, the impossibility of a lasting relationship and all that angst-ridden self-convictions. Now I am contradicting myself. And boy, am I utterly thankful…

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