My brother's getting civilly married tomorrow. Our family has been plunged into the whole thing all too suddenly. The would-be sister-in-law is four months pregnant and 18 years old.

My brother's life story could actually be straight out of a Maalaala Mo Kaya episode for all its color, drama, moments of glory and interesting dialogues here and there. Of course, TJ is the protagonist, the bida who has to go through all these convoluted scenes and make his way out of the knots he himself creates.

And I, I am the letter-sender who watches him on the sidetracks, occasionally berating him for messing up and always unfailingly cheering him on, empty beer mugs and all.

I harbor pessimism though.

He has gone through so much in his life already. He had broken his heart, has broken someone else's heart terribly (perhaps beyond repair), has made a lot of girls cry. For the girl he's marrying, he chose to leave a partner for nine years, thriving joint businesses, a very comfortable lifestyle and the security of a relationship tested by time.

What's in store for him now? He's jobless, penniless and unsure of what the future holds for him, his wife and his baby. I've been telling myself he shouldn't have left his partner because they had everything going for them. Nine years of being together is not a joke at all.

He shouldn't be marrying the girl yet.

But I understand his reasons and I respect him for it. I know he doesn't want what our dad did to us to happen to his baby. He loves the girl anyway, and that is a good reason.

But why am I still afraid that they'd just end up breaking up?

Why can't I have faith on their relationship just like I have faith on mine?

Perhaps it's just because I love my brother so much that I'm scared he'd hurt himself again. Perhaps it's my own bias kicking in. Perhaps it's because I'm currently reading Nick Hornby's How to Be Good that makes me all the more dubious of marriage.

Oh well. He'll be fine. He'll be fine.